Go back to search results

Recent Letter to the ElderWisdomCircle™

FRIENDSHIP: I'm losing interest in a friend I've been friends with for a long time
Letter #: 419062
Category: Friendship

Original Letter

Hello Elder wisdom This Is Me Andy again and I have another problem that I want to talk to you about problem is I have this friend on Deviant Art and we have been good friends for a long time and ever since I'm starting to get into doing crossover pics and memes of movies and TV shows that I have seen that he hasn't seen and I said I hope you do see him soon and he's taking forever to see them and I feel like he's never going to have the time to watch the movies and TV shows I've been editing with and and I've been showing him clips and character biographies of these people are and the times I show him what they are he said to me in the last pic I made yesterday this does not look like my type of show and I made an angry face slamming the door saying whatever and I don't know what to do anymore and I feel like my friend and I are growing apart and I don't feel like I want to be friends with the sky anymore I mean it's been a good long long long time we've been friends for a long time and I feel like that we're growing apart and I feel like I'm not being happy with him anymore and I don't know what to do so what do you think I should do while there was a circle about this this friend I have

Elder Response

Andy, I'm sorry it's taken a while to respond to your letter.

I know it may SEEM cruel, but all of go through periods in our life when WE change (or at least discover new interests and maybe even values). When this change occurs, the people IN our immediate sphere of influence may or may not fit as they did before. They- most likely- are changing, too. 

On a practical level, this means what was a close relationship may change. That doesn't mean you don't like a person- it just means you may want to spend more time with individuals who seem to better fit your needs. Now, you've seen people drop friends with little regard for their feelings. The better action step is to adjust- to accept the fact a person may not respond to images or ideas you've shared with them. You just move on----keeping contact when it seems appropriate BUT working hard to find people who are a better fit.

Enjoy the times when you and your friend seem to be on the same page- and maybe even talk about how your interests are changing. Honesty (with a touch of sensitivity) is always a good thing and can sustain a relationship even though it may not be at the same level or burn as intensely.

Hope that helps, Andy. Feel free to write back.

Best Regards,



 Give feedback on this letter

The ElderWisdomCircle™ program has been made possible in part through a generous grant from Google. || Administration
Copyright © 2018 ElderWisdomCircle™. All Rights Reserved. Design by Elana Churchill


 Site Map   |   Contact Us