For the second year in a row, I have a horrible roommate — and her boyfriend is living with us too. Can I snitch on them?

Sure you can, says our elder. It’s not snitching; it’s about your rights.

Dear EWC

Hi, so I’m a sophomore in college and I am stuck in a situation I’m not very happy about. Last year I had a horrible roommate who had people sleep in my bed while I was gone without asking and stole all my stuff. This year I moved into an on-campus apartment so I could have my own room. I was excited to finally make some friends as I was assigned a random roommate. I showed up and the girl I was supposed to be living with has her boyfriend living with her in her room (which is not allowed at all.) I’m frustrated because they don’t clean, they use all the dishes and don’t wash them, they are ridiculously loud and have sex really loudly. Also, he doesn’t have a job so when I get home from class he’s there without his girlfriend so it’s just awkward and I have to go immediately to my room and close the door. Not to mention I didn’t sign up to live with a couple so I’m paying just as much to clean for three people instead of two. I want to snitch on them but they would know it was me and so I’m not sure what to do. Help!

Dayle replies

This is not snitching — this is about your rights as a student and others who are doing something wrong. First, talk to the girl and let her know that this is not acceptable. And if it doesn’t stop immediately, you will be going to the department that assigns student housing and letting them know. Yes, she will be mad at you, but you are in the right and this is not what she is supposed to be doing and what is not allowed. She will probably take care of it herself and ask to be moved to another room where she thinks she can get away with what she wants.
Stick to your guns. You are in the right, and you can point out, when you report this, that you had enough trouble last year with a roommate and you are not willing to put up with this anymore. Yes, she will probably dis you to other people, but stay cool and either say nothing or say something simple, like “I couldn’t get my schoolwork done in that situation,” and leave it at that. It will blow over and you can handle the flack until it does.

Letter #: 448282
Category: Friendship