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Drifting apart from my bestie

He’s mad at me because I don’t want to go to the movies with him and his girlfriend.

Give it one more try, says our elder. But you may have to let him go.

 

Dear EWC

So my best friend, Mike, and I are drifting apart. I don’t really know what to do because I love him to death but all of my other friends hate him and he is mad at me right now. He is mad at me because I don’t want to go to the movies with him and his girlfriend and I’d rather go with my friend Mason. I personally think this is ridiculous because I don’t really want to go on a date with him and his girlfriend. I also feel like he just doesn’t care about drifting apart but I don’t think I want to lose him but I honestly have no idea. So, I just need advice on what to think about him and if I should let it happen or fight for the friendship even if he doesn’t care.

 

Mrs.G replies

I think you could fight a little more for your friendship; but if it doesn’t work, give it up. Perhaps you could try one more time to explain to Mike that it doesn’t make sense for you to go to the movies with him and his girlfriend. I wouldn’t mention your friend, Mason, at this time, however. Just focus on your friendship with Mike. He’s your main concern right now. Maybe you could ask him how he would feel going to a movie with you and your boyfriend. That might help him see the light.

Sometimes guys just don’t get it. They don’t always see things the same as girls and, therefore, misunderstandings occur. They just think everyone should get along and don’t understand that sometimes it’s complicated – especially when a girlfriend is involved.

I know Mike’s friendship has meant a lot to you, but maybe now it’s time to let go a little especially since it sounds like everyone is mad at everyone. If Mike is slipping away from you, it might be best just to try to understand that friendships don’t always last forever. As I said, though, try one more time and see what happens.

I hope you can get some fun back into your life, to where you are not always worried about this. Tell yourself you’ve had enough and owe it yourself to let whatever happens happen, knowing that you will do fine.

Article #: 431447

Category: Friendship

2 Comments

  1. My best friend elise , i love her to death and i would do anything to see her happy and she knows how much i love her but sometimes she just dont show me back the same love . ok i have abandonment issues and i need constant reassurance that the person i love will stay in my life , she knows that too but she try poorly to make me feel what i should feel , and im struggling alot , she go out alot without telling me to join , and her cousin best friend carole , she used to advice me alot and stay by my side alot when i was a young teen but these days she act like it was only a duty not a friendship , it hurts me i mean whats the problem , they hangout alot without informing me , and i swear i swear from all of my heart that its breaking me down and making me so sad . sorry for the long letter …i just need someone to listen and feel me . thank you so much that means alot .

    1. Administration Reply
      July 13, 2021

      Hello,
      If you’d like to connect with an elder for some advice on this, please go to our website https://www.elderwisdomcircle.org/ask-for-advice/ and an elder will respond. They do not respond to posts on Facebook in order to maintain confidentiality.
      Thank You,
      Elder Wisdom Circle

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