Broken Marriage, Broken Dreams

 

Original Letter

Hello, I just need someone to talk to about my current situation. Everyone woman that knows me (friends, family, co workers) and how I treat my wife say that I am everything that women look for in a man. But the woman I moved half way across the country for, dedicated my life to, and given all of my attention to after 12 years doesn’t want me anymore. She says “you treat me like royalty and the sex is great but I’m missing something. It’s not your fault it just me” . I am completely devistated, and broken. I can’t move on because she has infiltrated every fiber of my being. I gave her my whole heart and soul. She’s the mother of my 2 boys, my best friend, and the love of my life. She’s throwing everything that we’ve built together away for the feeling of excitement for something new and it hurts so bad. I would never wish the pain on anyone. I would rather die than to ever have to feel this pain ever again. The feeling of rejection and abandonment is so overwhelming. So I guess what I’m searching for is how to move forward when I’m so broken. Thank you for listening. MW

Elder Response

MW, I am happy to answer your letter. I was sad to read about your devastating situation. You have my sympathy.

The first thing that came to mind was marriage counseling. It sounds like this is something that might be able to turn things around for you and your wife, if you were both open to that. I wouldn’t give up unless you know there is no hope. Although I have never been to a marriage counselor, some years ago I did go to a psychiatrist as I was struggling with a few issues, one that was quite devastating. It was the best decision I ever made. There is no shame in seeking out help. One good way to find a marriage counselor is to Google marriage counseling.

Another thing you can do is talk with the  pastor at your church or other religious organization you may belong to. That person may know of any support groups in your area for situations like this. You could also Google that.

Your primary care physican may also be a good resource.

If none of this is agreeable, I would strongly suggest that you seek out the assistance of a psychiatrist to help you move on with your life. Your physician could suggest someone.

I hope that this has been helpful to you, MW, and I wish you a great deal of luck as you move forward.  I sincerely hope that things work out for you. I will be thinking about you. Think positive. I am a great believer in that.

I would love to hear how things work out for you.

Feel free to contact Elder Wisdom Circle in the future. If this was helpful, we hope you will recommend us to others.

Best Regards,

Lawry