A letter writer’s boyfriend hates it when she messages her friends.

Our elder is pretty clear on what she needs to do.

Hey, I am angry/upset with my boyfriend. I don’t exactly know why. Everyone is blaming me that it’s not going to work out because I’m not trying. I try so hard, I try to make him happy but he’s upset because I’m making friends at school and I want to message them in Facebook. Is it so bad that I want to talk to my friends outside of school? Some days he won’t even look at me or talk to me. I’m the bad guy for talking to my friends on Facebook but then he can talk and call a girl he’s liked for 2 years! They even send each other love heart emojis but I can’t talk to my friends on Facebook about video games? What the hell do I do?

Excelsior replies

The people who are blaming you are dead wrong about relationships. When we admit someone into our personal life, it’s a privilege we grant. We do this to enhance our life, and part of that deal is the expectation of mutual affection and respect. If someone you’ve voluntarily let in your life no longer lives up to that standard, they should be shown the door. Life is about moving toward experiences, people, and places that have a positive effect on us, and away from negative ones. Your so-called boyfriend has not only acted rudely toward you, but has taken up with another girl. Just as bad, he seems to think he has a right to tell you what to do. And to think “everyone” thinks you aren’t “trying”? Why on earth would anyone want to try with someone like this??!

The answer to your question at the end of your letter is easy: Tell him you don’t want to hear from him anymore and then turn on your heel and walk away. Then go surround yourself with people who are on *your* side and who make you smile… boyfriends included.  

Letter #: 409437
Category: Dating/Relationship