I was circumcised as a child and really want a restoration but my girlfriend is against it.
Well it’s risky, says our elder. I’d take a pass on this one.
Dear EWC
I’m dating a girl that I really like to the point that I think I’m in love with her and I want to start a family with her someday. Now the issue is that I want to go through the foreskin restoration because I don’t like how I look without it. I was circumcised as a kid. I feel like I had no say in the matter and my parents did this horrible thing to me for religious reasons. Now my girlfriend doesn’t like guys who aren’t circumcised. She said she’d support me through anything but she can’t sleep with me if I ever did the restoration. What should I do? I am lost. I love my girlfriend but I’m not comfortable with the way I look.
Nick replies
I am a believer in positive body image and if a part of your body bothers you, even if it functions perfectly well, for your psychological equilibrium, I am all for cosmetic surgeries and such. It is, in other words, your business and nobody else’s. In your case, if restoring your foreskin makes you feel psychologically better, I would be 100 percent in agreement with you.
However, and this is a mighty big ‘however’, I think this might be a situation where you take a pass on this reconstruction. The reason is that the risks outweigh the benefits.
It’s iffy at best. Yes, the uncut ‘look’ can be restored. But medically, there was cell damage when you were circumcised and you really are not going to restore the feeling that uncut penises still have. You may actually interfere with the pleasurable feeling you now experience in sex. You could, in other words, rob yourself of the pleasure you now feel, simply for the look you think you now want.
It also can happen that the foreskin, reattached and stretched over the head of your penis, will produce some painful erections. The other risk is infection. Those with uncut foreskins are advised, at least here in the US by our Centers for Disease Control, to do extra washing after any type of sexual contact, after sweating or after masturbation, because bacteria can linger in the folds of the uncut foreskin and cause rashes, bacterial growth or even hasten STDs should you catch one.
In addition, there is the recovery time. For several weeks following the restoration, you will not only be advised to avoid sex with a partner but avoid self-pleasure and even erections. These are a lot of unknowns simply to restore a ‘look’.
Why take the risk if your gf, whom you love and feel is ‘the one’ is both perfectly fine with your circumcised penis as it is (I’m presuming she has seen it and it is pleasurable for her) and is so turned off by an uncut one that it would be a deal-breaker for her? In other words, why not leave well enough alone and bask in the pleasure of knowing that your circumcised penis is quite attractive to the woman you love? Perhaps if you start viewing it as she sees it, you will think of it as a positive rather than a negative.
I don’t know your relative age. I’m presuming you are an adult. As I said I am all in with someone who wants body positivity. But this is one that I would pass on. After all, if all goes well for you romantically, pretty much only you and she are going to see your penis and evidently (I’m presuming) she’s quite satisfied with what you already have.
Questions? Send a follow-up. Otherwise please feel welcome to contact EWC in the future whenever you have any question on any issue you encounter. We are here to be of service.
Letter #: 450979
Category: Dating/Relationship