It’s like there are two of me

Confusing changes for a teen prompted this request for help.

Our elder shares suggestions on how to get some much-needed support.

Dear EWC:

I’m a 15 year old and my family doesn’t really believe in therapy, but for me I want to try it with or without them. It’s been a couple of days since I finally accepted this, but back in June, when I had a realization that my life is going through a rough patch, something or someone came out of me (and no I don’t mean literally).

It was like my left brain started working on myself as if there were two of me. I started to think it was me being responsible and growing up. But the more I see it, there are times when I talk to myself as if I was talking to someone else. I was talking to the left side of my brain, or as she likes to be called “Puddles” or “Frog.” When we both work together we are “Gwyn” but when we disagree with each other or when one of us shouldn’t be a part of it we let them take over. So there are more than two of us (Puddles the left brain and Gwyn the right brain).

We’re both asking someone to help us figure it out. It’s been 2 months and 25 days since we started to be together more. It slowly turned into two of us and we really like it. It finally feels like I’m not alone or when I am, I feel like I’m never alone when we are together working to be Gwyn.

To whom this may come up, please help us figure it out if, and you can, help us. Please chat with us soon. We like to use the pronoun (we/ us). I know I am young but my family doesn’t believe in inside stuff so I hope you can help.

Ruby-Mary replies:

Hello, and thanks for writing to EWC. I’m happy you’ve reached out for help as you struggle to understand why these confusing changes are occurring in your life at this time. It’s great that you recognize you will need help to figure this out. It’s wonderful that you also understand you may need professional medical help to get the answers you’re seeking and get the treatment you may need.

It’s unfortunate that your parents don’t believe in therapy, Gwyn. You are 15 and it may be difficult, but not necessarily impossible, for you to get professional help on your own. It is very important for you to share your thoughts with a trusted adult. If you have returned to school, please consider speaking with a teacher, administrator, counselor, psychologist, or social worker at school. These staff members are usually very helpful and have many resources to offer students. They may also help you approach your mom and dad about your mental health status and the need for you to get a professional diagnosis. It’s imperative that you get a diagnosis so you can get the treatment you need. The only way to get a diagnosis is to see a mental health professional.

Again, I’m suggesting you speak with your school personnel and/or your medical doctor. I think these professionals will steer you in the right direction to get the help you need. You should also consider speaking with an adult relative or family friend you trust who might help you express your concerns to your parents. Your parents need to know how you feel and why you’re feeling the way you do. They may be willing to speak with a mental health professional regarding your concerns. I’m thinking your parents may be open to getting you the help you need once they fully understand what you’re going through.

I’m not a medical professional, Gwyn, so I can’t tell you if you have DID or any other personality disorder. I do know, however, that it is very important for you to see a mental health professional. So don’t stop seeking help.

Thank you again for reaching out to EWC. We’re here to help so I hope I’ve given you some positive thoughts to consider as you seek answers. Please feel free to write again if you have additional questions or want to send an update. My thoughts are with you. Take care.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *