Trouble paying attention. Wandering thoughts. This teen’s lack of focus has her worried about ADHD—and she’s afraid to tell her parents.

Don’t let it slide, advises our elder. Seek help from someone you trust.

Dear EWC:

Hello, I am a 13-year-old girl and recently I have been having a few struggles. I have trouble paying attention, especially in class, when there is a discussion. I have trouble with remembering things I need to do and what is going to be due the next day. I have noticed that I get distracted in class, because my thoughts wander off to somewhere else. I also fidget or draw on my hands when I can’t focus in class as well.
I am not so sure if I have a behavioral problem or if I have ADHD. I am afraid to tell my parents because I am scared of their reaction. Most likely they will tell me that I am over reacting and that even if I will go and get it checked, this is a bad time to bring it up due to the pandemic. Right now, I am having doubts and second thoughts with everything I do and it just fuels the anxiety and makes it worse. Can you please tell me your insights on my situation? I think it might be of use to help my predicament.
Thank you for taking the time to read/ help me with my problem.

Good-Listener replies:

I do understand your concern and can sympathize, more than you know, with what you’re experiencing. However, I greatly encourage you to speak (quietly and calmly, and without your phone present) to your folks, even if it’s hard for you to do. I can’t tell you if you have any kind of learning issue; a professional has to diagnose you. However, as one who had a learning disorder but wasn’t diagnosed until I was 29 years old, I struggled unnecessarily when there might have been help available.

You could also try to speak to a teacher or guidance counselor, who may help you with talking to your parents. If you are as concerned as you seem to be, I do hope you’ll try to get some assistance – whether it be through a serious discussion with your parents or dealing with a school counselor. I realize everything is more challenging during this “COVID World”, but it may be possible to be tested through tele-health.

Again, I don’t know, but it’s absolutely worth looking into. Please don’t let this slide. There may be ways to make things easier for you to learn and if that’s the case, it will SO be worth it. I would like you to take this seriously and at least make the effort to find out what, if anything, is going on, and so that you may move forward without so much frustration and fear. Good luck.

Self-Improvement
#465398