From astrology to anti-vaxxer

The mother of my son is taking conspiracy theories way too far. I’m embarrassed. What should I do? 

I can’t tell you for sure, says our elder. But get that vaccine.


Dear EWC

I have been with the mother of my child for almost 10 years now. We’ve always had a pretty normal relationship with ups and downs like everyone else. She’s always been super into astrology, which I was fine with because I just saw it as quirky and fun, but when the pandemic hit, it seemed like she started adopting just about every Covid-19 conspiracy you can think of. It’s only gotten worse since the vaccine has been out. I haven’t gotten the vaccine but I’m not overly against getting it or anything and I haven’t really pushed it on her. It’s just really getting to the point where I find myself embarrassed by her and I’m starting to resent her. Anytime we talk about it, I come at her with facts that should debunk these theories but she just responds with, “That’s just what they want you to believe”.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to leave her, especially because we have a five-year-old son, but I don’t know if I can spend my life with someone who believes these things. What should I do?


PicklesMarie replies

I’m not positive about what you should do in total. I am, however, positive that you ought to get the vaccine. Do it even if she protests your action. This is another powerful way of showing (not telling) her that you don’t believe her ideas. 

Begin, slowly, talking about credible sources of information. Bring up examples. When she mentions a theory, ask where she heard it from. If she can’t/won’t answer, gently tell her you don’t agree… you want theories presented by experts with proof. 

Gently tell her that you are embarrassed by the unsubstantiated theories she is presenting. Tell her you need credible proof. Then, I’d suggest, stop discussing it. Remind her that couples don’t agree about everything. 

For now, be loving and supportive of her, but not all those conspiracy theories. Be strong. Be gentle. Don’t bother to argue; just let her know you don’t agree with all she is saying because she doesn’t have credible sources. You can love her without embracing all her ideas. Many people say many different things without proof. Point that out. 

There are so many untruths out there. It sounds like the woman you love isn’t mature enough to see that opinions expressed are not always true. Anyone can say anything. Those with expertise, however, don’t want to say things that reflect badly on their integrity. Try to help her figure out how she might check out the credibility of the ideas she hears. 

I hope my ideas help. Do some research online to find out how to check out credibility. I wish you and yours the best!

Article #: 475168

Category: Dating/Relationship

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