Community college + boyfriend?

Or straight to university? This letter writer is weighing up her college options. 

Our elder suggests listing out the pros and cons – and leaving her boyfriend out of it.


Dear EWC

Hi, I’m almost 18 and next fall I’ll be going to college. I’m debating between going to my local community college and then transferring to USC Beaufort or going straight to USCB. USCB is currently three hours from where I live. I’m dating a guy that lives an hour away from me (in the opposite direction) and we have been together, seeing each other about once a month, for over a year. I’d like to go to USCB instead of doing community college first, but I know that may mean losing my longtime boyfriend. I know high school boyfriends don’t mean anything blah blah blah they don’t last forever etc. But right now, he means a lot to me. Please put yourself in my shoes and give me some help.


Hildegard replies

Congratulations for graduating high school and going on to college! 

Now you have your first real adult decision to make. You don’t go into the reasons why you would prefer to go right to USCB instead of to community college. I assume you have considered the good points of each. Community college is more affordable and can be a good way to ease the transition from high school to college. On the other hand, going straight into university would be challenging and exciting. 

I don’t think that high school boyfriends “don’t mean anything” but I do think you should do what you think is right for you. If it’s USCB, then by all means go there, and perhaps the relationship will last. But don’t forget that whichever choice you make, you will surely be meeting lots of new people in either place. You’re already dealing with a long-distance relationship as it is. The year ahead, whichever choice you make, will put a lot of pressure on that relationship. 

You’ll have to make yourself one list of why you should go to USCB and another list of why you should go to community college. Leave the subject of your boyfriend off both lists. Then it should be pretty clear which is the right choice for you. And the right choice just may not be the easier choice. Best of luck to you. You have a bright future ahead!

Article #: 429939

Category: Dating/Relationship

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